*thought i'd get this shitpost out of the way since im so hilarious, i am not the real kylew. this is a extremely satirical piece portraying as him. call me immature for doing all this extra shit, but shit's funny so... fuck it
Hi, I'm Kyle. I'm a 20 year old manchild that had my parents pay for everything, I love to show off how much money I have with every chance I get. I'm rich, but not to the point where I have just 100s like every other soundcloud rapper out there. I make sure I show off my earnings I get from lottery tickets because fuck actual work! Also, I have showed off that I have over 2 grand in my bank but it's from those poor suckers that I scammed out of because they are peasants, I'm better than all of them, and they actually have to work unlike me. I'm depressed (let's not forget about the cigars), all I do is tweet bullshit motivational claims like I was a white Tai Lopez, but instead of knowledge, it's them dolla dolla bills in my bank. Oh, you wanna know what's in my bank account? Let me post a receipt with my brand new red fucking iPhone 7. Question anything about me, you will immediately get shut down because you don't know me personally, it's not like my online presence shows my character. Remember that girl I was dating that was 3 years younger than me, and it's not like it was in person because police can't catch me on the internet, lol.
Oh Zachary, remember that iPad I promised to give you? Go fuck yourself, you don't need it you peasant. Go buy it yourself.
Anyways, I'm gonna go wipe my ass with these 20s I have for my Twitter picture. See you broke ass people l8tr.
Hi, I'm Kyle. I'm a 20 year old manchild that had my parents pay for everything, I love to show off how much money I have with every chance I get. I'm rich, but not to the point where I have just 100s like every other soundcloud rapper out there. I make sure I show off my earnings I get from lottery tickets because fuck actual work! Also, I have showed off that I have over 2 grand in my bank but it's from those poor suckers that I scammed out of because they are peasants, I'm better than all of them, and they actually have to work unlike me. I'm depressed (let's not forget about the cigars), all I do is tweet bullshit motivational claims like I was a white Tai Lopez, but instead of knowledge, it's them dolla dolla bills in my bank. Oh, you wanna know what's in my bank account? Let me post a receipt with my brand new red fucking iPhone 7. Question anything about me, you will immediately get shut down because you don't know me personally, it's not like my online presence shows my character. Remember that girl I was dating that was 3 years younger than me, and it's not like it was in person because police can't catch me on the internet, lol.
Oh Zachary, remember that iPad I promised to give you? Go fuck yourself, you don't need it you peasant. Go buy it yourself.
Anyways, I'm gonna go wipe my ass with these 20s I have for my Twitter picture. See you broke ass people l8tr.
Last edited:
